Ever wonder why some people seem to grow more resilient and mentally stronger with age, while others struggle?

I’ve been on this journey myself—working to build a stronger mindset as the years pass. And what I’ve learned is that it’s just as much about letting go of certain behaviors as it is about adopting new habits.

Today, we dive into seven behaviors that could be keeping you from becoming mentally stronger as you grow older.

Letting these go has been transformative for me, and it could make all the difference for you, too.

Let’s get into them.

1) Overthinking

We’ve all been there. Faced with a decision, and we just can’t stop thinking about it. We mull over every possible outcome, every potential consequence until we’re stuck in a loop of our own thoughts.

As we grow older, this tendency to overthink can become a major roadblock to mental strength.

As noted by the folks at Very Well Mind, it can “create an endless cycle of stress and worry, which can ultimately cause you to feel frustrated and less confident. ”

To become mentally stronger, it’s important to learn how to manage this behavior. This doesn’t mean you should stop thinking things through, but rather that you need to know when enough is enough.

When you find yourself overthinking, take a step back and ask yourself if your thoughts are productive. Are they helping you come to a decision or just causing more stress?

2) Neglecting self-care

I’ll be the first to admit, when life gets busy, self-care is usually the first thing to go. I used to think that skipping meals, sacrificing sleep, and pushing myself to the brink was a sign of strength and dedication.

As I’ve gotten older, though, I’ve realized that this behavior is actually detrimental to my mental health.

There was a point when I was working late at night, eating poorly, and barely getting any exercise. I thought I was being productive, but in reality, I was just burning myself out.

My energy levels dipped, my mood fluctuated, and my mental clarity suffered.

That’s when I decided to make a change.

I started prioritizing self-care – ensuring I get enough sleep, eating nutritious meals, and adding regular exercise to my routine.

The difference has been night and day. Not only do I feel physically better, but my mental strength has also improved.

This is well backed up by experts, too. As noted by Choosing Therapy, self-care is associated with a host of benefits, like increased self-esteem, lower stress levels, and decreased risk of anxiety.

So take it from me (and the experts), if you want to become mentally stronger as you age, don’t neglect self-care. It’s not selfish; it’s essential.

3) Living in the past

While it’s natural to look back on past experiences, dwelling on them can hinder our mental growth.

Whether it’s regretting past mistakes or longing for ‘the good old days’, living in the past prevents us from fully engaging with the present.

To become mentally stronger, we need to learn how to let go of the past. This doesn’t mean forgetting our experiences or ignoring their impact on us.

Instead, it’s about acknowledging what happened, learning from it, and then moving forward.

4) Avoiding challenges

It’s easy to fall into a routine as we age, sticking with what’s comfortable and avoiding anything that feels challenging or unfamiliar. Yet, this behavior can stall our mental growth.

Facing challenges head-on, even when they’re intimidating, is a key aspect of mental strength. Challenges push us out of our comfort zones, forcing us to adapt and grow.

They can be difficult and uncomfortable, but they also provide us with the opportunity to learn and develop resilience.

5) Neglecting relationships

“No man is an island.” We’ve all heard this phrase, and it holds a lot of truth.

Mental strength isn’t something that thrives in isolation; it’s deeply connected to the bonds we have with others.

Experts back this up. According to theGreater Good Science Center:

“Though we may think it’s easier to change ourselves when it comes to facing adversity—to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps, as they say—research suggests that positive relationships and supportive environments have an important role to play.”

I’ve learned this firsthand. During periods when I neglected my relationships, focusing only on my personal goals, I found myself feeling disconnected and drained.

But when I made the effort to invest time in meaningful connections—reaching out to a friend for a chat, setting aside quality time with family—the sense of support and belonging significantly boosted my mental resilience.

Building mental strength doesn’t mean going it alone. It means leaning into those key relationships, supporting others, and allowing them to support you.

6) Holding onto grudges

I’ve held onto grudges in the past, letting old wounds fester and cloud my judgment. I thought that holding onto my anger would somehow punish the person who wronged me. But all it did was weigh me down.

Holding a grudge is like carrying a heavy backpack everywhere you go – it’s exhausting, and it doesn’t actually get you anywhere.

Learning to forgive was a game changer for me. It didn’t mean that what happened was okay, or that I had to forget it. It simply meant that I chose to let go of the bitterness and move forward.

This act of forgiveness – towards others and myself – has been key to becoming mentally stronger. It might be for you, too.

7) Fear of change

Last but not least, as we age, we face numerous changes – in our bodies, our lives, and our circumstances. But too often, we resist these changes out of fear or uncertainty.

Resisting change keeps us stuck in the past and prevents us from growing mentally stronger.

Embracing change, on the other hand, equips us with the mental agility and resilience needed to navigate life’s ups and downs.

So don’t fear change – embrace it. It’s one of the most powerful tools you have on your journey towards mental strength.

Final reflections: The power of choice

At the heart of becoming mentally stronger lies one fundamental principle – the power of choice.

Our mental strength isn’t determined by our circumstances, our genetics, or our past. It’s shaped by the choices we make every day – how we think, how we respond, and most importantly, how we choose to grow.

Choosing to let go of these behaviors isn’t about punishing ourselves or striving for perfection. It’s about embracing the potential within us to grow stronger and more resilient.

Whether it’s choosing to face a challenge, let go of a grudge, or embrace change, every choice contributes to our mental strength.

So, as you reflect on this journey towards mental strength, ask yourself – what choices will you make today?

The post If you want to become mentally stronger as you get older, say goodbye to these 7 behaviors appeared first on Small Business Bonfire.